I am so, so funny.

despair-oscar-keys-60736-unsplash

Photo by Oscar Keys on Unsplash

I get email updates from the National Center for Faculty Development and Diversity because I once did a week-long online writing boot camp with the organization.

The most recent one that caught my eye had the subject line: “Tracking Your Resistance.”

This puzzled me, because at first I thought they were talking about The Resistance to Trump’s administration. But no, they were talking about writing down one’s resistance to writing. They suggested keeping a log of all the reasons you have been procrastinating writing.

And, glancing at my clock, I realize with a sinking heart I’ve spent a full hour staring at my laptop without writing a word. Maybe two.

And so, humbly, I present to you:


My Resistance to Writing, Today

I think I need a book that’s upstairs and I’m feeling lazy.

I just want to get back to this person in an online chat real quick.

I wonder what my hair looks like today?

This is a good song. Have I heard it before? Aren’t I so interesting that I only listen to weird Finnish pop music?

Oh, man, I just thought of a hilarious tweet!

Why aren’t people liking my tweet? I am so funny.

….Aren’t I funny?

I’m doomed. I’ve procrastinated too much in my life, so being productive now won’t help anything.

Despair.


Resistance to writing is something a lot of people struggle with, I hear. But wish me luck as I switch off the wi-fi and write.

I have quiet thoughts and loud thoughts when I write. And even though writing is a lot of fun, both the quiet thoughts and the loud thoughts make me feel terribly lonely.

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